I talk a lot about self acceptance and being happy in your skin. I’ve been on this journey for a long time though and I’ve almost forgotten the steps I took when I decided to stop hating on myself.
Here are 4 steps to get you started.
#BodyPositivity is the way
Instagram is great for this but it’s also easy to find yourself following a certain type of person and becoming disillusioned with reality.
Let me explain.
Instagram is full of vloggers and active people who post their workout videos, before and after pics and #TransformationTuesday images.
This allows people who have lost weight to give themselves a pat on the back, to give hope to others who are struggling, to inspire others who have no belief that they can do the same.
HOWEVER
You could be forgiven for seeing all these images and thinking that life is all about exercise, weight loss and dieting. Particularly if someones “before” image looks like you now. Suddenly that insidious thought of
“I must not be thin enough” becomes “I must not be good enough”
and with each scroll of the app you find yourself becoming less and less content with your body.
^^^ See how quickly that can happen?
Thankfully instagram is also full of body positivity accounts where people, particularly women, are posting images of themselves celebrating their body and NOT caring about weight loss. They may be a size 6, they may be a size 26 but they are happy with who they are right now.
Humans come in all different shapes and sizes, there is nothing wrong with anyones body. Following these accounts gives you a more balanced view on how you can love your body, regardless of size.
Stop judging other people.
This one is massive. I’ve seen others take this simple step and it’s changed their perception of themselves dramatically.
The bottom line here is that it is none of your business what someone else looks like. Their size, shape, clothing or appearance does not affect you whatsoever. So stop it.
This one is hard to get into the rhythm of, particularly if your social group routinely does this. It might be second nature to see someone looking a particular way and make a comment.
Catch yourself when you do this.
Why is it important to you that you judge them?
Do you feel better about yourself?
Why does that make you feel better?
Challenge this behaviour, because once you stop judging and start seeing positives in other people, it will change the way you look at yourself.
Stop taking in negative media.
It’s better now than it’s ever been but it’s still a far cry away from where it should be. “Health” magazines all seem to be focusing on one thing:
Fat loss.
For women we must get smaller.
For men they must get bigger.
But we must all change in the fastest way possible or we are undesirable, no-one will want to have sex with us and we’ll all die alone.
Complete BS.
Stop buying these. Stop looking at them. Stop believing them.
These magazines do nothing for any aspect of your health.
Accept compliments.
Somewhere, some day, someone is going to say something nice to you. How you react to this is important.
And it is also cultural.
In your culture, when someone compliments you, the only acceptable response may be to disagree with them.
I urge you to ask yourself if that’s helpful to your self-esteem.
Really think on that for a second.
If someone tells you that you’ve done a good job at work, or your hair looks really nice or they think you’re funny or talented and you instantly disagree with them, what message are you giving yourself?
They must be lying, they can’t be trusted and why would anyone say anything nice about you?
Then we wonder why we struggle with self-acceptance?
The next time someone compliments you, open up to the possibility that they’re not lying and that they are seeing something in you that you’re just not ready to see.
At least be curious of the possibility that you’re wrong and they’re right.
Even a quiet “thanks” is enough.
(btw this is not to be confused with blindly forcing yourself to be ok with, or accepting of, cat calling comments from strangers in the street. Compliments and blatant sexist slurs are two different things and sleazy sexualised comments on your appearance are not ok.)
To sum up…
Following even one of these steps is a move in the right direction to discovering how to accept yourself as you are.
Do not wait until you consider yourself “thin” enough before you start to love yourself. The journey to self acceptance starts now.
– Ainzlie
p.s – if you’re looking for a weight loss plan that wont trigger you over your body image, lets have a chat.
